Temporary Phase

If maybe there is somebody who by any chance saw me going through the street or saw me on train or any other public transportation, you probably thought that I was such a weird robot with no intention to speak or smile even only a little bit. Don’t know why I’ve been too lazy to speak, to smile, and to laugh maybe since last week. Not bcs of work, really. Work is all fine. I know this is just a temporary phase I have been getting used to.

Sometimes I am feeling so stupid and foolish. Let’s clear this game. When you have two different groups, let’s say. You gather all things you know which are already clear. On the other side, you put the rest of them which you think it’s still unclear in the other group. This is really a simple game but you just think it too deep and sometimes think out of human brain can probably tolerate (sorry, overreacting). I mean, oh come on you just have to count which one is worth, which one can prove you better to make a decision and that’s it. Let it goes along your way and take it further. But the problem is, sometimes you just wanna belong to another group. Well, my reality is not actually as complicated as you think it is.

Ah, today is a big day and everyone has a day off from work. I used this day to do the laundry by myself and go out alone as usual. I am still not changed kok. Masih suka random main nyari wifi, nyari tempat sepi just to escape. Didn’t even plan it but when I found myself too bored being at home at noon, I just simply went away as usual.

Since work begins, I feel so good bcs I drink mineral water a lot more than I was. Kalo biasanya kuliah beli minuman selalu berwarna dan semaunya, walaupun sekarang masih bisa minum semaunya juga sih cuma lebih prefer to put a tumbler contains of mineral water on my table. I drink iced tea when I am home. Still yah. Entahlah, lagi pengen random aja nulis. Write everything I wanna write. Well, I am addicted to smell of Sea Island Cotton right now. You know what? While I am typing this, I always grab that lotion, spin the bottle cap until it’s open and put my nose closer and inhale. It smells so good. I am a goddamn weird these days. Biasa juga nyium tiap hari tapi kenapa hari ini pengen nyiumin itu setiap saat. Aneh bet. Gue sebel juga dari kapan tau nyariin warna lipstick sama kutek yg sejenis burgundy gitu or dark red. I have been looking out at some shopping centers but I got nothing, not even closer. Terus bete. Sekarang juga lagi suka beli pastel dan kue sus di jembatan penyebrangan Sudirman karena cukup enak buat sarapan. Not too light but enough to wake me up until lunch. For addictive song to me recently, it can belong to Kodaline. I keep playing Moving On from its newest album. It’s always helpful taking me into my sleep every night. Now, I am listening to a playlist from 8tracks. It is made by KloeLee. She names it Pencil Lead and Lined Paper. These songs are so into meeee!!!!!

Now I know how the workers feel when they face a day off. It feels so amazing!!!! Yeah, you can imagine that we work everyday without even knowing what time we can come home. Everyday we struggle leaving home and do the same thing when come back. Train makes us sick. A minute we’re late, that’s when we risk ourself worse to get another train which we never know whether we could get in. You know some workers area which I always think it’s cool to work there but you have to struggle more, even makes you in pain. Udah seminggu ini sakit di tangan gue tak kunjung sembuh. Pergelangan tangan lebih tepatnya. Gue gak inget gue diapain di kereta yg pasti minggu lalu, sempet kedapetan beberapa kereta heboh. Udah keretanya panas bikin gue pusing, ditambah dorongan dan desakan dari segala penjuru membuat gue semakin pasrah di dalam kereta. Pas sampe rumah, pergelangan nyut-nyutan -_-

But yeah, you struggle to work, you work to survive. Then, tomorrow is…………………

Thursday

Means

Go back to work

After

Islamic New Year’s day off

Bye..