Few hours left to welcome 2017 and as years before, I am just enjoying myself sitting and listening to music from a new TV inside of my own room. Yeaaayyyyy!!!! I decide to listen a full concert of James Morrison for now. While Mas Asong is away to have a party at his friend’s house.
2016 is not really what I expected. I can say I am kind of proud of my life better in 2015. 2016 kind of goes quiet flat. I just go to work on weekdays and hang out on weekend with friends. I don’t have big achievement, neither time to have a big solo journey. Though somehow, I am such really blessed having many lovely office friends who always make me more crazy. I previously thought it was kind of hard finding crazy mates after college but this is it, I can still find them.
Something that I have planned for the next one or two years is I am not wanting to be in a relationship. Idk, I am just scared of a man or maybe I am just not confident enough of myself. Year hasn’t even changed yet but that plan seems to be by perforce, considered again.
Last week, Mas Asong, dad, and I went to look for a house since Mas Asong will get married next year. After a tiring journey taking a look to more than five houses, we had lunch at a mall nearby while discussing which house we preferred for Mas Asong. Suddenly, my dad said “Hopefully, you can also have one later on ya, Dek”. Then I replied “Yeah, ofc I would have one too, Pak but it depends on my husband later where he would stay”. Dan ternyata, my dad added “Hopefully you could already bring him to your brother’s wedding next year”. Great, my plan is ruined.
God, marriage is still a really really far away from my plan. Even I am not in the mood to find any interesting man. Something I never forget to say in my prayer is that God, please make this heart settled for not having interest to any kind of man for right now. When I start to kind of like a man, please just stop it as soon as possible. Just make this heart neutral and uncommitted to anybody.
Ah, I can’t wait to enjoy my consecutive leave next week. I have my flight schedule at 07.55 PM. I have to go all the way from Sudirman. Do you think I can make it less than 3hours?
Anyway, I am just gonna go to another big island within this country but honestly, I barely arrange my trip, not even make the itinerary yet. Furthermore, I only have my one way ticket. I don’t know which city will be my last stop to end the journey. So, yeah I am gonna buy the ticket back to Jakarta later.
To sum up this 2016 which is closely going to an end, maybe in some ways you have a perfect plan inside of your mind but again, we are not living with only ourselves. There is always a time when you are forced to beat your ego and see if somebody else’s want will work for your life. Maybe my first experience in something doesn’t work well but I am learning much things from that. I am not chasing any deadline, I swear. Whatever it is, I choose what makes my heart settled and what best for my future life.
Lastly, Happy New Year everybody. Be good always, my dear 2017!
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